


Stuck With Me

by outerspaceisbetterthannothing



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:01:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29669046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/outerspaceisbetterthannothing/pseuds/outerspaceisbetterthannothing
Summary: Can a sudden meeting really change your life for the better? Or will it be just another mistake they made?The last (?) album by The Neighbourhood was a big inspo, so you can def use “24/7”, “Scary love” and “Stuck with me” for the atmosphere.
Relationships: Ashton Irwin/You





	1. Chapter 1

Early spring breeze was life saving. Ashton took a deep breath of fresh air and suddenly realised that he didn’t want to get back inside that club. It was just another, quite usual night they were spending out after a studio day. He didn’t even care anymore whose idea it was to go to the club or what party they were at or what were celebrating. He stopped keeping track of that just like he stopped keeping track of time. It was definitely much easier this way. And much safer too.

His phone vibrated in his back pocket. He considered the idea of picking up, he really did. But then he just decided not to. The night was so wonderful he basically didn’t need anything more right now. Or anybody for that matter. 

Ashton looked back at the club entrance. Music was blasting, a line of drunk and high people waiting for their chance to get more drunk and high. What was he even doing there? 

He shook his head answering his own thoughts, crossed the road and just walked down the street. He wasn’t going to walk the whole way back to his house, just wanted to spend some time outside before calling an Uber. So he just walked, down the street and then around the corner and down another street full of other clubs and bars. He was passing some people here and there, lonely or in small groups, happy or sad, couple girls even crying. Everybody’s searching for something on the night streets of LA. And no one's caring for him. It was so peaceful like that, no friends around, no fans screaming and taking numerous photos, nothing and no one to distract him. 

Ashton didn’t know, how much time he spent like that. But one moment everything somehow changed. He just felt that strange urge inside of him, he stopped and looked at the other side of the road. She was there. A young girl, she was sitting on the sidewalk not far from some bar’s entrance. Her dress was ripped at the hem, at least he thought it was ripped. Maybe it was just some strange fashion or something. But her shoulders were definitely shaking and she was wiping her cheeks, so she was obviously crying. Ashton looked both sides of the road and crossed the street.

Trying not to question his own motives, he came up to the girl and sat down next to her. He could hear her sobbing while walking towards her, but the moment she noticed him, all the sounds stopped. 

She looked at him warily and tried to move away.

“Do you, maybe, need help?” Ashton asked in a soft tone, understanding with delay that he had probably scared her. 

“Do I look like I need help?” she answered, her voice is still wary and her eyes not leaving his face for a moment. 

Ashton laughed at that and looked at her. Suspicion was still all over her face, but behind it Ashton could see anger and… despair?

“Frankly, yes,” he admitted. “You look exactly like you need help.”

She just shrugged and looked away.

“Not like it’s any of your business.”

“True,” Ashton agreed easily. “But what if I still can help you?”

She sighed and asked in an extremely tired voice, “Seriously, dude, what do you want from me? I’m not in a mood to be picked up tonight. And so you know, in case you have anything on your mind, my friends are about to walk out of that bar and I also can scream very loudly.”

“I’ll take that into consideration if I decide to rape or kidnap you, thanks,” Ashton chuckled. 

“You must think you’re so funny.”

“Actually, I know I’m funny. From time to time I can even be hilarious,” Ashton agreed, taking his phone out of his jeans pocket. “And in case you ever meet real maniac or rapist on the street so late at night, consider being a little more convincing.”

“The hell are you-”

“You’re sitting on a pavement and crying at almost two in the morning, while your friends are drinking inside?” he pointed out, all the amuse gone. “You either have the shittiest taste in friends, or there are no friends of yours in that bar,” he stated unapologetically, watching her eyes filling with tears. “And judging by your expression, the second option is closer to the truth.”

“Fuck you!” 

She didn’t let him say anything in return. The next thing Ashton knew was her walking away fast and him still sitting on a pavement. He jumped up and rushed after her.

“Hey, I’m sorry, okay! Didn’t mean it wrong,” he tried to make her if not stop, then at least slow down. “Just let me help you, okay?”

But she just dropped over her shoulder, “Don’t need your help.”

Ashton sighed and hurried in an attempt to catch up with her, which wasn’t so difficult thanks to height difference. 

“Okay, I got it. But let me just order you an Uber, please?” 

At this she immediately stopped, eyes glued to the pavement under her feet and arms tight around her shoulders. Ashton took it as a positive sign. He switched his phone on and tapped at an Uber logo. 

“Seriously, it’s going to be like the fastest way to get rid of me,” he chuckled again, looking at her and trying to read her face. “Just tell me the address. I promise I won’t follow you like some kind of lunatic.”

But she just stood there, looking at the ground and keeping silence. Ashton’s smile dropped. He basically understood nothing. What did that mean? And then he saw tears streaming down her cheeks, her shoulders started shaking again. Ashton raised a hand to her arm, but then hesitated for a moment. Could he touch her? Would she let him? What if not?

But then she started going down back on her knees, and he forgot all his questions. He grabbed her, preventing her from falling and pulled into his chest, holding her tightly and feeling her shoulders shake in silent sobs. So they stood like that, she was crying her heart out and he was just holding her, a girl he knew nothing about, not even a name. 

Soon the tears ended and she pulled away, wiping her cheeks again.

“Thanks,” she mumbled. “And sorry.”

“That’s okay,” Ashton assured her, feeling wet spots from her tears on his shirt get cold from the breeze. “So, after I haven’t killed you in so long, would you let me order you a taxi?”

She looked at him with wide eyes, obviously astonished by his ability to joke at such a moment, but then to their mutual surprise she snorted. And then she shook her head and looked away.

“I’m afraid that’d be a problem,” she explained.

Ashton frowned, “Why is that?”

She took a deep breath, suppressing new wave of tears and answered, “Because I have nowhere to go.” 

Ashton sighed too, mirroring her, and went back to the Uber app.

“What are you doing?” she asked, watching his manipulations, the wary expression back on her face.

“Getting an Uber,” he explained like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“To where?”

“To my place.” Ashton finished placing an order, switched the screen off and looked up at her.

“And you expect me to go with you?” she asked, taken aback by his bold move.

“Yes, I do. Unless spending nights on the street is some kind of hobby of yours,” Ashton snapped back suddenly feeling irritated. He just wanted to help. Was it so difficult to comprehend? Or so difficult to accept?

“I can’t go with you!” she stated stubbornly, her look at the ground again.

“And why is that?” he asked, his body started to feel tired and numb. 

“I don’t even know your name!”

“It’s Ashton. And if I wanted to kill you or something, I’d already do it.”

“Oh, thank you, now I feel much safer!” she snarled.

“You also know that I’m a funny type of guy. People often know less about each other before one night stands, so if I were you, I wouldn’t be so picky.”

“But you don’t even know my name!” she exclaimed as in the last attempt to find any valid reason for it to be a bad idea.

Ashton at the same time was just standing there, looking at her and loosing in the battle of trying to hide his smile. A car stopped right behind his back. His phone clicked, signaling that was their car. 

“What’s your name?” he asked, smile still on his face.

Her shoulders went down. “It’s Y/N.”

“Nice to meet you, Y/N,” Ashton chuckled, opened car door and waved his hand, inviting her. “Now, shall we?”

But she stood there still and kept watching him.

“I promise, in the morning you can go wherever you want and I won’t try to stop you. But now, please, get in the damn car.”

Ashton knew he probably pushed too much, hard expression on his face and ice in his tone. But he was tired from both the long day before and their ridiculous conversation. He just needed her to get into that car and go home and fall asleep. And maybe deal with it in the morning. Or maybe not. Whatever. Now he just needed her to do as he told and he didn’t give a fuck if he could scare her off. But unexpectedly, that was exactly what finally set her in motion.

She threw him another angry look and dived into the darkness of a taxi backseat without any other word. Ashton followed suit, thinking what a crazy night it happened to be and wondering what waited for them in the morning. 

He looked at her face, flashes of street lamps lighting it up every couple of seconds. 

What a crazy night…

***

The house was dark and empty. Nothing new.

Aston suppressed another sigh and moved toward the kitchen. He dropped his keys on a kitchen island and opened the fridge. He couldn’t hear her steps, her flats producing no sound at all, but somehow he knew, she was behind him. He could feel her eyes burn a hole in his head.

“Want anything?” he asked, grabbing a bottle of water.

He looked back when didn’t hear her answer, wondering if his feelings played tricks on him. But no, there she stood, right next to the kitchen island, looking around utterly surprised and obviously feeling like a fish out of water. Ashton followed her look and chuckled. He also asked himself sometimes why he’d need such a big house. 

She looked at him slightly scared by the sound of his laugh.

“No, thanks,” she answered, shivering under his look.

Ashton shrugged, closed the fridge and motioned her to follow him, “Let’s go then.”

They crossed spacious living room, went up the stairs. One of the guest rooms was right next to the stairs, but under some impulse Ashton passed it, heading further. He opened the last door in the corridor and wanted to turn on the light, but stopped himself the last moment. As if light could ruin something. As if there was anything left to ruin in this house. 

“You can stay here,” he mumbled, letting her come inside. “There’s a shower there,” he pointed to the bathroom door and looked again at her. She was looking back at him, wide-eyed like she was still surprised by his acting. She moved past him and looked around the room, feeling natural in the dark just like him. The hem of her dress, still a question for Ashton, brought an idea.

“You need something to change in, hold on a moment,” he said, leaving the room abruptly.

“Like I have a place to run to…” he heard her whisper back in the room and smiled. There was something endearing in her gloomy sarcastic remark.

He was back in no time, handing her his sweats and some band tee. And earning another exasperated look. Ashton felt his shoulders sink. He already opened his mouth to say that it was just clothes, nothing much. And that it was only natural to have a shower after sitting on a dusty pavement for God knows how long. And that she doesn’t need to be afraid of him doing something inappropriate if she steps into the shower in his house. And even that he didn’t really want her to sleep in one of his beds in a dirty dress, even if he wasn’t the one to clean the bed later. He really wanted to tell her off, but then he decided to keep it to himself. Just because she was standing there in the darkness of his guest bedroom and Aston suddenly realized how tiny she was. She was lost, all alone in the city, God knows what shit she had in her life if she had nowhere to go to in the middle of a night. And she was in the house of a guy she’s never seen before. She definitely deserved a medal for not combusting that very moment because of everything happening around her. Ashton stepped forward, trying not to come too close to her. He put his clothes on the bed and took couple steps back to the door. 

“I’ll just leave it here. You can use it if you want. Or not, it’s up to you.”

She didn’t say anything in return, not a single gesture could prove that she even heard him. 

“If you need anything or decide to kill me in my sleep, my room is opposite to yours,” he jokingly informed. 

But no answer again. She was standing there, watching his every move, but producing no reactions.

So Ashton found nothing better than to leave without any other word.

He closed her door behind him and in one big step crossed the corridor, diving in the serenity of his own bedroom. He fell on the bed, carefully made by his housekeeper after he left in the morning, and heard the muted sound of the shower in her bedroom.

He couldn’t help his smile and finally relaxed, falling asleep faster than ever.

***

Y/N opened her eyes lazily. Her head hurt a little, no surprise after everything she’d drunk last night. Dim morning light crept up the duvet, the bed too comfortable to think of leaving it. Strange, but it was strikingly more comfortable than usual.

She sat up harshly and looked around an unknown bedroom. The memories of last night coming to her in waves, making everything so clear and so scary. 

She creeped out of bed and looked at her dress in hesitation. The dress was dirty, ripped at the hem, and what was even worse, it was his favourite dress. She didn’t want to put it on at all. Y/N went to the bathroom and inspected herself in the mirror. Her flats would look really odd with that guy’s sweats. Could she just sneak out in these clothes? Not like that dude could miss them, judging by this house, he could afford a ton of such sweats and tees. But still, they weren’t hers to take. Y/N sighed heavily, washed her face and changed back in her dress. She felt awful, dirty, used and betrayed. But all of this was better than stealing. No matter what happened to her (and what was about to happen), she still had some dignity left. 

She looked out of a huge window, trying to understand what time it was. She couldn’t remember, where she left her phone, and there was no clock in this bedroom. But the sky wasn’t of much help, all grey and gloomy it hid the sun from her eyes. 

She folded the clothes she’d slept in neatly and left it on the cover of freshly made bed. Then she opened the door, noticing that her hands were shaking slightly and went downstairs. 

Y/N couldn’t understand why she was so nervous. Half of her was praying for the owner of the house to still be asleep, so she could just go away never to remember him again. Half of her wanted to see him again. Look in his eyes in the daylight and maybe even thank him for his kindness. 

First she heard the sound of something being fried. Then she saw him, with his back to her. Ashton was cooking breakfast for himself, oblivious to the fact that there was an audience. He was in a pair of sweats matching ones he'd given her and a plain black tee. She could hear him humming some melody but she didn't recognize the song. Y/N took couple more steps forward and tried to think of what to say to attract his attention, but her brain was empty. And normal phrases seemed too awkward. 

“How did you sleep?” Ashton asked not looking at her. He didn't even move his head a little to catch a glimpse of her standing there. Everything about him was strange. 

“How did you know I was here?” Y/N asked. 

Now he looked over his shoulder, smile on his face. 

“Your sight can burn holes in the walls. Kinda difficult not to notice you,” he chuckled. “So how did you sleep?”

He switched the stove off and opened a cupboard in search for a plate. 

“Okay, thank you,” Y/N answered. “And thank you for letting me stay the night, but I have to go, so…”

Ashton put two plates on the counter. 

“Won't stay for breakfast?”

Y/N looked at him with the same astonishment in her eyes as she did the previous night. She literally couldn't wrap her head around this man's actions. 

“I've here toasts and omelette with some veggies. And there's some pretty good coffee. I'm sure you could use some after last night,” and he winked, putting a plate with food in front of her and turning on the coffee machine. 

“So it's bed _and_ breakfast?” she couldn’t help but snort. 

“Don't get me wrong, I don't usually cook for girls in the morning. Just made too much for one this time.”

“That's exactly what I thought,” Y/N nodded but didn't move closer. 

Ashton shrugged. “Come on, we both survived last night, which proves that no one's a maniac here. Doesn't it give us a right to enjoy some breakfast?” he waved to the chair. “Please?”

Y/N didn't want to stay. It was difficult to explain, just an odd feeling in the back of her mind. She knew the longer she stayed, the harder it was gonna be for her to leave. But she was hungry, and coffee smelled heavenly. 

So she gave in and sat at the table. 

“Black coffee? Or with milk?” Ashton asked, satisfied with her decision. 

“With milk,”she answered, still looking shy and a little confused. “And sugar if you have it.”

Ashton chuckled on her choice and put everything on the kitchen island in front of her. Y/N hummed a _thank you,_ fetched herself a cup of coffee and picked up a fork. She took a first bite under his stare.

“That’s very good,” she said, figuring he was waiting for her reaction.

Ashton nodded but didn’t look away from her as he didn’t touch his breakfast either. 

“So, what exactly happened to you?” he asked a moment later, making it difficult for her not to groan out loud. That was so predictable, and so off the point. She should have just gone when she had a chance. Now he would ask her about all that shit, making her re-live all of it while telling him. And then he would give her some ass awful advice only a well-off person could give to somebody from absolutely different social level. And then they part. He would just go on with his day feeling totally satisfied with how he helped her and showed her the way out (which she, of course, had gladly taken). While she would just feel even shittier than before and with the same problems and no idea what to do. 

“I mean, I know it’s not really my business,” Ashton admitted as there was only one way to interpreter her silence.

“It’s not,” she agreed, still looking at the plate in front of her. 

“But you know, sometimes you just need to speak about it out loud to make it all a little better.”

She let a humorless laugh and looked up at him to note, that saying it all out loud won’t do her any good. But the look in his eyes stopped her the very moment. The was no patronizing in his eyes, no smug superiority. His look was calming and soft and warm. She couldn’t help but blurt, “I broke up with my boyfriend.”

He nodded, “I’m sorry.”

She looked back at her plate and took a coffee cup, starting to twist it nervously on the table surface. “That’s okay, I suppose. Not like he ended up being a good guy after all.”

“Still a shitty situation.”

She didn’t say anything in reply. _Shitty_ didn’t even start to describe all of it.

“So you lived with him?” Ashton asked again. “That’s why you said you had nowhere to go?”

Y/N nodded again. 

“Why not go crash at one of your friends’?” he frowned.

Y/N smiled and shook her head. “It’s all very complicated, Ashton,” she noted quietly and switched her attention back to her omelette. She was very hungry after all. 

Ashton also picked up his fork and for several minutes it was just them eating breakfast. 

“How old are you?” he asked, trying again to make this conversation work.

“Nineteen.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Why don’t you go back to your parents then?”

“You’re not gonna give up that easily, are you?” she asked not sure to get pissed or amused over his persistence. 

“Nope, that’s just not me,” he shook his head smiling. 

And suddenly, just from the look of his smile, Y/N started sobbing. She lowered her eyes, hid her face in her hands in an attempt to calm herself down. She heard the fridge door open and close the moment later, and then he put something in front of her. She moved her hands to be able to look. He put a chocolate mousse next to her plate and a spoon. She sniffed one last time and looked at him quizzically. 

Ashton shrugged, “You can’t really cry while eating a chocolate mousse.”

She snorted. “Wanna bet?” 

But then she took a spoon, opened mousse and dig into it.

“So, I’ve met Josh last spring. We with my two best friend were at some college party, and he was there too,” she looked up at Ashton again. He looked taken aback by her consent to speak after all. “Josh is my, well, now definitely ex-boyfriend,” she explained.

“I figured,” he nodded, finally sitting down.

“So, he was there. And it was like, I don’t know, love at first sight. I left that party with him, even though I was never that kind of girl. But I could never say no to him. Guess that’s what got me here,” she chuckled. “We didn’t even do anything that night, just drove around my neighbourhood till the sunrise. I was crazy about him. He was all I could think or speak about. Which really pissed all of my friends, they never liked him. But it was spring, we were finishing school and they found it in them to bear with me.”

She took another spoon of mousse, making a short pause in her story. She wasn’t looking at Ashton while speaking, but could feel him looking at her face intensely. 

“He was all the live-free kind of man. I saw he was a definition of trouble as people like my father would say. Maybe that was exactly what tempted me so much. I was about to go to Berkeley, study law, had all this life plan my dad made up for me. But Josh though it was stupid. Education is a waste of time, especially law school,” she shrugged. “Spend years learning Latin to become a part of the system which oppresses people. We were spending nights on the beach watching stars and that was honestly the only life I wanted to have in the future. All dreams of successful career lost. So you can imagine the reaction of my Dad, when I said I wasn’t going to Berkeley. We had a huge fight at home. And we didn’t use to fight with my Dad at all,” she paused again, finishing her mousse. “I just packed some clothes and went to Josh. He said I did the right thing. Dad tried to reach me, but I was too stubborn to listen to him. And I was eighteen already, so he didn’t have any legal way to bring me back home.”

She shrugged again, turning back to what was left of her omelette. 

“That’s even tastier after mousse,” Y/N said couple moments after that.

Ashton chuckled. “I should include it in the recipe.”

He watched her eat for some time more, before asking, “Why didn’t you go to one of your friends?”

She sighed with a mouthful of omelette. 

“Well, they were all pretty much against me moving in with Josh and not going to college. And they expressed their opinion straight, so I kinda broke all the ties,” she shrugged. “They are all in colleges around the country now, anyway.”

Ashton rubbed his chin getting deep in his thoughts. She finished her omelette and looked at him again with a shy smile. 

“What are you gonna do now?” he asked.

Y/N shrugged, drinking her coffee in silence.

“I still need to get back to Josh’s place to get my stuff. Hope he at least grabbed my purse and my phone yesterday,” she mused out loud. 

“You gonna stay with him?” he asked again in the same serious tone.

She frowned. “God, no, of course no,” she shook her head. “Not after what happened yesterday.”

“So what are you gonna do?” Ashton kept pushing her.

She sighed. Looked up at him again. They both understood it at the same moment. She had not a slightest idea what to do. He wasn’t going to let that happen. 

“You can live here,” he offered carefully.

“Thanks, but no,” she replied even before he finished his sentence.

“Why the fuck no?” Ashton chuckled in disbelief. He was more than prepared for her reaction, knowing couple of things about her already, but it still amused him. “Not like you’ve got much of a choice!”

“Yes, thank you for reminding,” she growled back and hid her face in her hands again. 

“Listen, you don’t wanna get back to your dickhead boyfriend. And you’re not ready to get back to your Dad, and have no other relatives and friends as I understood,” he listed, looking at her. “And I can definitely spare a room.”

“Since when is it a reason?” she mumbled from behind her hands.

“Since I wanna help.”

She took a deep breath, put her hands down on her lap and said, “Thank you for that, but I can’t just start living with a guy I met less than twelve hours ago.”

“I’m not asking you to live with me. I’m offering you a position of a roommate!”

Y/N raised her eyebrow. “A roommate?” she repeated skeptically. Ashton nodded, his face lit up with a hint of a smile. “Not sure if I can afford half of the rent,” she mumbled, looking around his place.

“We can call it a deal with a delayed payment,” he shrugged nonchalantly. 

She shook her head in disbelief. “Okay, but i still can’t do that.”

“Why?” Ashton uttered.

“Because you’re obviously crazy!”

“I’m not crazy,” he stated in a much calmer voice. “But I have a younger sister. She’s couple years younger than you and also extremely stubborn. I wanna believe that if she’s ever ends up at a situation like this,which I hope she wouldn’t, there’ll be somebody to look after her.”

“I’m not stubborn,” she almost pouted. Ashton gave her a look, but didn’t say anything about it. They just sat there glaring at each other, she was not ready to give in, he was not ready to give up. 

“Just for a while,” Ashton almost pleaded couple minutes later. “Just till you understand what to do next and get your act together again.”

But Y/N kept staring at him in her silent thinking. 

“For a couple of days at least?” Ashton wasn’t ashamed of the begging tone anymore. He had to make her stay. He didn’t really understand why. She was right about everything, they were just two strangers, shouldn’t have cared for each other, and he did act like a crazy guy. But he had to make her stay. That much he knew for sure. “I won’t forgive myself if I let you go and then find out something bad happened to you.”

And with that she sank on the table. “Okay,” he heard her muted groan.

“Okay?” Ashton asked not fully ready to believe his victory.

“Okay,” Y/N repeated, moving up. “But only for couple of days. And only as a roommate,” she added rather awkwardly.

Ashton snorted, “And about that you shouldn’t be worried at all.” 

Y/N made a face, while Ashton took their plates and put them into the sink. He rushed in the living room then, put on a black hoodie with a roman numeral three and picked up his car keys from a coffee table.

“So are you going or what?” he threw in her direction, heading straight to the front door.

“Going where?” Y/N asked. She was utterly at a loss with his mood swings and his hastiness.

Ashton stopped right before the doors and looked at her, bright smile on his face. “I thought you wanted to get your stuff?”


	2. Chapter 2

“So, how exactly are we going to get inside?” Ashton asked after couple of minutes.

Y/N sighed heavily. 

They were sitting in his black pontiac not far from the place she only yesterday could call home. Her eyes were glued to the entrance, waiting and praying, that her ex’s lazy ass will get out soon enough. His car was parked right in front of the building, so she was pretty sure he was still inside. And having close to no wish to see Josh ever again, she asked Ashton to wait till he would go somewhere. Despite an early hour, they could already feel the heat of another sunny day in LA. Y/N sighed again.

“I know where he keeps the spare key,” she confessed, feeling Ashton looking at her. 

Ashton sniffed, but didn’t say anything. They drowned in silence again. It wasn’t heavy silence, but Y/N would lie if she said it wasn’t an awkward one.

Ashton turned on the radio and started going through the stations, but after five minutes or so he turned it off again.

“So, what do you do?” Y/N asked and snorted right after those words left her mouth.

Ashton looked at her, quirking his eyebrow quizzically. 

“I’m sorry,” she said, still giggling a little. “Thought that I’ve already agreed to kinda live with you and only now started asking questions. And, I mean, with my luck, chances are you’re in a gang or something.”

“That would be not very good for you,” Ashton muttered, amused more by her nervous giggling than the fact that in her imagination he could end up being in a gang.

“So, what do you do for a living?” she asked again after calming down.

“I’m a musician,” he stated simply and earned another look of surprise.

“Musician?”

“Well, yeah.”

Y/N moved in her seat to face him, though still having the entrance in her peripheral, and asked again, her words full of doubt, “No, wait, like real musician getting paid for his music or like every second guy in LA who isn’t an actor?”

Ashton laughed, quite surprised by her remark and how fair it really was. 

“No, first option,” he answered. “I’m actually in a band.”

“What kind of band?” she asked, hardly capable to keep her interest at bay.

“Well, you’ve probably heard of us,” Ashton said, looking away from her and getting slightly uneasy all of a sudden. He totally forgot the feeling of that moment, telling somebody about his work and the band, too used to people knowing his name and almost everything that was behind it. “5 seconds of summer?”

He felt with his skin the awkwardness of that moment. She looked at him amused, shaking her head a little. “Never heard,” Y/N admitted easily and then added, “but I’m not into music, I never remember band’s names. So what kind of music do you play? Are you a guitarist or something?”

“I’m a drummer,” Ashton chuckled. From all the girls in this city he found the one who’s never heard about him. How little was the chance, really? “As for what kind of music, well, kinda pop-rock maybe. I don’t even know, that’s a hard question, we try not to narrow ourselves with specific genres, to be honest.”

He looked back at her, she was puzzled, but still interested. 

“Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have megalomania or something, but you must have heard at least some of our songs,” he said with yet another chuckle.

Y/N just shrugged. “I don’t really care about music,” she explained. “Anything that plays on the radio or at a party is good enough for me.”

“Unbelievable,” Ashton rumbled, getting his phone out and going through his spotify. Couple moments later first sounds of  _ She Looks So Perfect _ filled the car. 

Y/N kept her eyes on the phone in Ashton’s hand. Soon she was nodding her head to the beat, a ghost of a smile on her lips. “Not bad,” she said halfway through the song, “but never heard it before.”

“You have to be kidding me,” Ashton almost groaned, tapping on another song. 

_When you're talking to your girls, do you talk about me?_ Luke and Mike started the verse. Ashton fixed his eyes on the girl in his passengers seat, who was smiling at him and shaking her head in silent apology.

“Come on! It was the soundtrack for the  _ Ghostbusters  _ remake!” 

“I don’t watch remakes,” she winced.

“Is it some kind of a life philosophy?” Ashton couldn’t hold back and laughed.

“You can say so, I guess,” she agreed. “They’re just never as good as the original. But the song is cool.”

Ashton huffed. Now it was a challenge. They did joke about being the biggest band nobody heard about, but… If Ashton was completely honest, he always took it as a joke and joke only. He scrolled up through the list of their songs and tapped on another one.

_ Remember the words you told me "Love me 'til the day I die" _

“Oh,” she ushered with a look of genuine surprise on her face, “I’ve heard this! I’ve definitely heard this, at a bar, I think! So it’s your song? That’s sick!”

“Tell me about it,” Ashton laughed again at her excitement.

“So how did you make it to the big scene?” Y/N asked, giving a building in front of them another worried look. She knew they couldn’t sit here the whole day. 

“Well, we’re from Australia,” Ashton started.

“I thought, I heard the accent, just couldn’t figure it out,” Y/N said, smile still on her face.

“Yeah, we left home long ago,” he nodded. “So we kinda started pretty young, got some fans there, then moved to London, got to tour with 1D. Have you at least heard about One Direction?” he mocked her, quirking an eyebrow again.

“Yes, I have, mister Music. They are a boyband, right?”

“Yeah, so we toured with them for some time, then released couple of pretty successful albums. That’s like long story short.”

Y/N nodded. The rest of the album came after  _ Youngblood,  _ and Ashton turned on his phone again to stop the music, but she stopped him almost intuitively, lightly brushing her hand against his. He looked at her, stunned with this contact. And ten hours ago she couldn’t even speak to him. But Y/N didn’t notice the surprise in his eyes, her attention at the building again.

“So, your band is like 1D?” she asked a moment later. 

“No, we’re different. And we’re better,” Ashton answered with a smug smile. 

Y/N turned to him again, amused with such a bold answer. “How so?” 

“We’re still together,” he stated.

“1D aren’t together anymore?”

Ashton burst out laughing at the exasperated look on her face. She couldn’t fake it even if she tried. “You’re unbelievable,” he repeated. 

Y/N rolled her eyes and smiled, looking even younger than she was. 

But the very next moment her smile faded away, as the door to the building opened, two people coming out. The guy was tall and lanky, he was holding a girl in a too short dress by the hand. Ashton didn’t even need to ask if that was Y/N’s ex, he understood everything by the way she straightened up and got smaller at the same time. The guy and the girl got in an old rusty car and went away in an opposite direction. Ashton looked at Y/N again with a question in his eyes.

Y/N shrugged. “I’ve already known he was a dickhead, not a big deal,” she answered his silent question. “Let’s just go through with it as fast as possible.”

Ashton nodded and they both got out of the car. 

The insides of the building were just as shabby and uninviting as the outsides. Ashton looked at Y/N’s back, she walked first. She seemed so young, pretty and innocent. She didn’t belong here in a slightest. Couldn’t she see it herself?

Y/N, unaware of the attention given to her back, made her way to the post boxes, fished the key out of one of them, and rushed to the stairs with a satisfied grin on her face. Ashton followed suit. 

Little apartment on the third floor though looked cozy and carefully looked after. Ashton didn’t really expect to see that, but, he would bet, it was all because of Y/N. A week without her, and that douchebag of her ex would make this place fit the surrounding. 

Y/N didn’t waste any time. The moment Ashton entered the apartment, she was already in the tiny kitchen searching for something. Two minutes later she rushed into the supposed bedroom with a pack of trash bags. Ashton looked around the living room and decided to follow Y/N.

Bedroom looked as neat as the living room except for the undone bed, left by two people not so long ago. Y/N was standing there and just looking at this bed, like only now she’s realised that her ex cheated on her in their bed and it was really the end of their relationship. Ashton coughed, bringing her back to the reality. Y/N jumped a little and tuned to the wardrobe, trying not to look at Ashton. 

“So, what exactly happened between you and that moron?” he asked, looking as she took one trash bag and started to put there all her clothes, not even looking at things that were disappearing inside the bag. Ashton came up to her and picked up the trash bag to help her.

“Thanks,” she smiled a little, but all her look was screaming about how awful she felt here and how much wanted to leave. “Nothing new, to be honest,” she started talking, not sparing him another look. “We were at that bar with his friends. I never really got on with them, they just didn’t like me, don’t know why,” she shrugged.

_ That’s because they all knew you were thousand times better than all of them, _ Ashton thought, but kept it to himself. 

“So Josh, my ex, started to flirt with that girl, which wasn’t new also. But, for some reason, I wasn’t ready to tolerate it anymore. So I came up to him and we started fighting, right in the middle of a bar. What was different this time though,” Y/N continued, taking another trash bag and collecting her shoes, mostly flats and sneakers, “is that he was really angry. I’ve never seen him so angry with me. When things went really off the window, he started shouting, said I was useless, worthless, not sexy. You know,” she shrugged, stepping to the chest of drawers, “all the pretty things a guy can say to his girl. And then he did the most romantic thing, he slapped me on the face and said I can go back to the hole he digged me out from.”

Ashton felt his knuckles hurting from how hard he was holding on a trash bag. He looked at her back, wanted to say he was sorry that she end up with a shitty man like that, that she had to go through all of it. But something stopped him. He knew, pity was not something she needed or wanted right now. 

“And thank you,” she said, not looking at him but still being able to read his mind. “For not saying how you’re sorry. With Josh I totally got what I was asking for. I was stupid from the beginning, and here I am now.”

_ Nobody deserves that,  _ thought Ashton still looking at her back. He felt the urge to say something, to change the topic, to get her from that awful memory somehow. But she did everything hersels. Y/N grabbed a hoodie and a pair of leggings from a pile of clothes she digged from her drawers and disappeared in the bathroom, leaving Ashton with “Hold on a second.”

Ashton looked around the bedroom one more time. Not more than ten minutes she spent packing her stuff. Empty shelves in a closet looked oddly sad. Y/N packed all the books from a tiny bookshelf, the only two photo frames and rather small pile of makeup. Not much, but without these few things the room was left empty and almost depressing. Not a sign of a neat cozyness he saw when entering the room.

Y/N came back from the bathroom and pushed the dress from the other night down one of the trash bags with a severe sigh. 

“God, I hate that dress so much,” she mumbled, looking around. 

“Why to take it then?” Ashton chuckled looking at her concentrated face, as she was packing last bits of her staff and checking all the corners for missed items. 

She looked back at him quickly, not really registering him standing there, too occupied with her mission. 

“Don't wanna leave anything behind,” Y/N answered quietly. “Don't wanna him having anything of my staff. He's taken more than enough from me already. I'll decide on what to keep and what not later.”

Ashton only nodded, knowing well what she was talking about. And suddenly an odd feeling came to him. He couldn't even fully comprehend it, but he felt proud. He was standing there, in the bedroom of her cheating asshole of an ex, looking at her tiny figure and couldn't help feeling proud. The way she coped with it, the way she finished it once and for all, not even sparing him another tear, not wishing for him to have a single reminder of her. She was so strong, and yet so unaware of it.

“I think, we're done here,” she said, looking around for the last time. “Let's go back to the living room.”

Ashton took two full trash bags, she grabbed the third, filled only on a half. She spent even less time in the living room, taking little interior stuff like half burnt candles and one tiny fern which was carefully held by Ashton, while Y/N was finishing packing. 

“What did you do?” Ashton asked just cause he got bored from standing there with a fern in his hands.

“What?” she looked up at him with surprise in her eyes, like she forgot again she wasn’t alone.

“While you lived here,” Ashton explained. “You said you didn’t go to college. What did you do?”

“Almost nothing,” she admitted with a sigh and looked away. “I tried to get a job couple of times in the coffee shops nearby, but Josh didn't like when I was away for long, so all my attempts usually ended up in scandals and me spending hours here without him. I mostly read.”

“He didn’t like you to be away?” Ashton asked in confusion.

“Yeah,” Y/N shrugged. “Said my place was next to him. Or started blaming me for being greedy if I tried to point out that I need my own money.”

Ashton nodded again. He didn't know what he could answer to that. He remembered his own words from the previous night. What if it was Lauren? Could she fell for such guy? Could she believe in this being love?

“But don’t worry,” Y/N continued. “I’m going to get a job as soon as possible.”

“It’s not why I-” Ashton rushed, “I just asked.”

She looked back at him and surprised him with a bright smile. “I know. But I do wanna get a job. I feel like I’m finally got tired of doing nothing and being noone.”

“You’re not noone,” Ashton shook his head, deep frown on his face. Y/N only smiled at him.

She grabbed a sparkly purse from under a sofa and examined its contents, Ashton got a glimpse of a shattered phone screen. She chuckled and rushed back into the kitchen. He heard clicking of some jars and then the crunch sound of paper. Right after that Y/N came out, hiding something in her purse. 

“We good to go,” she said and grabbed on the nearest bag. 

Ashton hesitated for a moment, not knowing how to cope with the fern and two bag, but Y/N grabbed the poor plant from his hands. Ashton took other bags, suppressed an unwelcome sigh drawn by the weight and followed her to the door. 

Y/N closed the door behind them, locked it and left the key where she’d taken it in a post box on the ground floor. The way to the car was silent. As all her stuff ended up in Ashton’s car trunk and she herself on a passenger seat, holding the poor fern, Y/N congratulated herself on going through it so fast and firmly. And yet, when Ashton was setting off and driving from their parking lot, she glanced in a rearview mirror at the building she had been calling home for over nine months. And now was praying never to see again. Was she really letting go of it? Was she ready to let go of it? 

They turned and she couldn’t see the building anymore. Whatever. Was she ready or not, life was already pushing her away from what she knew. And Y/N had no other choice than to start moving along.

***

Ashton pushed the door to his bedroom and froze.

Darkness around reminded him of a previous night, which had happened an entire lifetime ago. Yet less than twenty-four hours had passed since their meeting. He turned to the door to her room and heard it again, the sound that made him freeze. A quiet sob.

Ashton took another step to the room she’d occupied and raised a hand to knock. But he didn’t. He put his hands in his jeans pockets and just stood there, in front of the door, listening to her quiet crying.

Truth to be told, he wasn’t surprised. He remembered her earlier in the day, when they went to grab her stuff. She was so fierce, so on-a-mission-like. She didn’t break then, didn’t go into reminiscing on the good old days (which probably weren’t that good). And he felt how strong she was that moment, how ready to change her life. But Ashton knew what was behind each strong woman. He saw it in his mom too many times before. He felt it inside himself every so often. These mountains of sadness and regret and pain, they shown noone. The darkness of their bedrooms was the only creature who could see their burden. And no one else.

Ashton sighed inaudibly and went to his own room, hesitated at the door frame, but left the door open, God only knows why. He fell on his bed and stared into the ceiling.

He wasn’t surprised, yet it was so odd to hear her crying. She was so lively and almost happy just couple hours ago, when they were having dinner.

_ “So you cook.” _

_ Y/N jumped at the sound of his voice, coming so unexpectedly from behind her back. She gave Ashton a sheepish smile and shrugged.  _

_ “You made breakfast,” she explained, turning off the stove and checking on the meat for the last time. “I thought it would be only fair if I cooked dinner. Being roommates is about the partnership, right?” _

_ Ashton chuckled, “I guess.” _

He helped her set the table and they spent more than half an hour just talking about stuff. She happened to be a good cook, and mocked his slightly surprised looks.

_ “What do you mean, you don’t usually eat?” she asked. _

_ “In here, I don’t usually eat in here,” Ashton explained. “We eat out a lot, or just order something. I almost never cook.” _

_ “Oh, how boring,” she pouted in fake disappointment. “And I almost thought you’re a vampire or something like this, so you don’t need food at all.” _

_ Ashton couldn’t hold back the laughter. “First gang member, now the vampire. You do have a wild imagination.” _

_ She shrugged nonchalantly. “Well, if you ever have a chance of becoming one of these, vampire is better.” _

_ “Why? They’re killers.” _

_ “Gang members are too, but as a vampire you can live forever at least,” she explained, finishing her dish.  _

_ “You wanna live forever?” Ashton was having a hard time rushing after her thoughts. _

_ “Why not?” she smiled and with that started clearing the table. _

Ashton sat up on his bed. He never knew the soundproofing was so terrible in this house, but he could basically hear every damn sob of hers. He couldn’t just lay here while she was crying her heart out, could he?

And then he stood up, came up to his door and closed it to muffle the sounds. He lied back on the bed and sighed one more time hiding his face in his hands. 

He remembered his own heartbreak, happened so long ago. He was hurting like hell and needed someone to come ease the pain. He needed a person to just listen and understand his pain and struggling. But if at the moment of his darkest grief he’d had somebody to listen, he wouldn’t have spoken up. He wouldn’t even have let this person in. He was aching and he wasn’t ready to get help. Some wounds needed not only time to heal, but also loneliness and growth. And no matter how much he wanted, he couldn’t help her with that. 

Ashton thought of Lauren again. Would he come up to her, if it was his little sister there crying in the bedroom? He sighed again. No, he wouldn’t. He would fully respect her right to cry in the security of her bedroom and come for help the moment she was ready. 

His phone vibrated shortly somewhere on the bed, signaling about the new message. Ashton stretched his arm and grabbed the little device. 

He sat up and read the message.

He fully respected Y/N’s right to ache and suffer alone in his guest room. But he also couldn’t just sit here listening to a living creature in pain so close to him and not being able to help in any way. 

So he stood up, took his jacket and left the room. He couldn’t stay here, so he would go to where he could easily forget it all. 

***

Y/N woke up to the sound of shower. She stretched without opening her eyes and thought it was just like waking up in the Josh’s apartment with walls so thin you could hear everything you neighbours were doing. Including morning showers. But still she couldn’t help noticing how everything was slightly different, even the sound of water. 

She picked up her phone from a night table and switched on the shattered screen. It probably broke when Josh threw her purse on the floor of his apartment, or any other moment, she didn’t have a clue and wasn’t interested for that matter either. Still, she could work out the time through the thick net of cracks. It was almost ten, but felt like early morning. Y/N wasn’t the person to sleep long in the day, and even ten was past the waking time for her. But today she didn’t really want to get up. Preferably at all. 

Y/N buried her face in the pillows and sighed. She felt terrible, not a piece of yesterday’s joy and resolve left in her. She couldn’t even remember why she started crying yesterday night. One moment she’s deleting Josh’s number and all their messages, the next she’s sobbing under the covers of the bed. She cried for several hours, couldn’t even remember crying so much ever before. And then she fell asleep worn out by all of the crying. So today she was useless, ugly and tired as hell. She didn’t want to get out of bed and exist. And she definitely didn’t want Ashton to see her like this. 

The water stopped and couple moments later Y/N heard the door click. She didn’t know what plans for the day he had and if she could just avoid him today, but she was willing to try. 

Truth to be told, Y/N was surprised to hear him at home at all. She remembered him leaving late at night, she heard his car. But she didn’t hear him coming back, being asleep at that time obviously. She wondered for a moment where could he go at almost one in the morning, but dropped it fast, knowing it was not her business anyway. 

The next thing she heard was the sound of opening door to his bedroom and his pretty fast steps down the hall. Couple minutes later his car drove out of the parking lot, and Y/N took a deep breath of relief. 

He left. Hopefully for the day. Surely real musicians had a lot to do, like write new music or whatever other shit he was doing. And she could just proceed with her day, being miserable. 

Y/N spent another hour just wallowing in the bed, drowning in sleep and coming up to the surface again, until she decided to finally get up and at least cook some food.

She spent some time in a bathroom, found in one of the trash bags, which were standing now next to the window, her favourite soft socks, decided that she was covered enough for an empty house in just socks and a band tee, and left her room.

The living room was just as bright and spacious as she remembered, with its light walls and big windows. Y/N though for a moment of how wonderful it would be to call this house a home. But she pushed that idea from her mind. She was here just for the couple of days and had no right for such thoughts. 

“Good morning,” she heard from a kitchen and jumped from a shock. Y/N turned back and saw a strict looking lady in her mid-fifties probably, looking at her with a smile on her lips and a stern expression in her eyes. 

Y/N just froze there not knowing what to say. Was it his mother? Another roommate? Just a person he sent to deal with the problem, which Y/N was, because he regretted helping her in the first place?

“My name is Mrs. Powell, I’m a housekeeper,” the woman explained, not caring much for a startled expression on a girl’s face. “Mr. Irwin has left to the studio for the whole day. But I’ll be happy to get you an Uber as soon as you’re ready.”


	3. Chapter 3

Y/N was staring at Mrs. Powell with terror in her eyes, her mind rushing in search for anything to say. This lady thought she was Ashton’s one night stand and, frankly, Y/N couldn't really blame her for that. Mrs. Powell had probably seen this one too many times. And knew exactly what to do with it. 

Mrs. Powell sighed, probably irritated by the lack of response, and said, “It would be better if you go upstairs and get dressed while I’m ordering you a taxi.”

Y/N understood there was no chance she’d sound believable if she started explaining she wasn’t Ashton’s one night stand. But still she decided to try.

“I know what you think and how it looks like, but the situation is actually different.”

“Of course it is,” answered Mrs. Powell with a soft smile and Y/N understood the housekeeper didn’t believe her in a slightest. “And I’m sure Mr. Irwin will call you later in the day. But, unfortunately, I have quite simple instructions and have to follow them. So, would you tell me the address?”

Y/N took a deep breath and opened her mouth, ready to spill the whole story of how she ended up in this living room half naked. She couldn’t imagine any other way to stop Mrs. Powell from kicking her out of the house, truth was the only option. And exactly the moment she was about to start, the sound of a car parking outside attracted their attention. They both looked at the door, which opened almost the very next moment. Ashton looked like he was running back here, though Y/N could swear he had to take half a dozen steps from the car to the front door. 

While she and Mrs. Powell were gawking at him, Ashton took couple more steps towards his housekeeper and went with “Good morning, Mrs. Powell! You’re early today!”

The housekeeper turned to him fully and looked at him like at a complete idiot. The same look was sent Y/N’s way no longer than couple minutes ago, and that almost made her chuckle. But something stopped her. She looked behind Ashton’s back and understood why she felt so uncomfortable again. A man stood in the doorway. Tall, dark-haired, in a black leather jacket with his hands in his pockets. He was eyeing Y/N suspiciously. She looked down on her legs, realizing how little of them was covered. She pulled her tee down in a weak attempt to cover up a little more. Ashton threw her a fast glance and arched an eyebrow, sharing his opinion of her look. Y/N rolled her eyes and shrugged, like explaining she wasn’t expecting to be in the presence of such a large party. And that she thought this situation was all his fault. Cause it was his fault, and the way he looked away from her again only proved he understood it too. 

“I forgot to tell you last time you were here,” Ashton went on hastily, looking at Mrs. Powell, “about Y/N,” light gesture her way. “She’s a daughter of an old family friend.”

“From Australia, as I take it,” Mrs. Powell asked him, narrowing her eyes. She wasn’t buying it, Y/N understood, she didn’t believe him.

“Yeah, right from Australia,” Ashton confirmed, grabbing this idea like a God’s helping hand. “Y/N’s just came to the city, going to… to study here, so came to prepare and staying here for some time.”

“I see,” Mrs. Powell nodded, not looking at Y/N, sarcastic smile playing on her lips, ready to bloom in full force. 

“I’m really sorry I forgot to tell you Y/N was about to come,” he repeated.

“That’s okay,” Mrs. Powell smiled, almost sincerely, and turned to Y/N, “Nice to meet you.”

Y/N nodded in return, not able to open her mouth under intent looks of three people. She met Ashton’t eyes and got his silent “I’m sorry” his lips produced carefully.

“Mrs. Powell comes couple days a week to take care of the house,” he continued out loud. 

Y/N nodded again. What else could she do or say?

Awkward silence fell on them. Y/N was staring at the floor, feeling her cheeks burning under the look of Ashton's friend, still standing in the doorframe. If he was Ashton’s friend, of course. She could feel Ashton turning to her and then to Mrs. Powell and then back to her again in search for anything to say. She had no idea, where the housekeeper was looking and was only thankful that not at her. The situation could have been even funny if it wasn’t so uncomfortable for everyone. 

“Okay, we have to go to the studio, so, I think, we’ll leave you two,” Ashton said finally. He waited till Y/N looked up at him and added, “I’ll see you in the evening. Goodbye, Mrs. Powell.”

He crossed the space between where they were standing and the entrance in three big steps, but the guy who was standing there all this time didn’t move. He was keeping his eyes on Y/N, making her feel more and more uneasy with every moment passing, and didn’t pay any attention to Ashton standing right in front of him. Why was he eyeing her so intently? What was on his mind? Y/N felt she could kill to find out what he was thinking about this moment. 

“Dude, move!” Ashton grumbled. “We’re late as fuck.”

The guy turned to Ashton, offered him a funny look, then glanced at Y/N for the last time and disappeared behind the door. 

Y/N was left with the housekeeper. 

“I-” she stumbled, “I will go put some clothes on,” she said and without letting the older woman tell her anything in return, went up the stairs, pulling her tee as low as it was only possible without tearing the fabric apart. 

Little bedroom Y/N went so far to calling her own met her with comforting silence. Y/N leaned back on the door and closed her eyes, drowning in the embarrassment of what’s just happened. 

She knew she was bound to meet people from Ashton’s life as long as she was living with him now. But she would have enjoyed it much more if she had had some pants on during the experience. And that guy Ashton came with. Y/N wondered who he was, a friend or just a colleague. Definitely not just a colleague, too interested in her he was, and something made Y/N sure the reason of his interest was not caused by the lack of her clothes. What was he saying to Ashton after they left? And what did it mean for Y/N? Would that guy be against her living here?

A sudden heatwave rushed through Y/N’s body. She shook her head and reminded herself she was not living here. She was not living with Ashton in this insanely expensive and terribly empty house. She was just staying here. For a couple days. A week at best. Right till she’d be able to afford a place of her own. And no longer. 

And, consequently, there was no need to worry about the impression she had on his friends or housekeepers, she thought, pushing herself from the door to one of trash bags with her stuff, which were standing near the window now. She needed pants. She needed to calm down. And she needed a plan. Cause she had only a couple of days left here. A week at best. And no longer.

***

Ashton was driving faster than he should have, but couldn’t bring himself to slow down. He was trying to persuade himself this sudden nervousness was because of being late to the writing session, bat that was just an excuse. He was avoiding looking at Cal, not ready to answer questions his friend must have got ready for him. In an attempt to hide his own discomfort Ash turned the radio on and started to hum along the new Halsey song.

“Are you fucking serious, man?” Calum chuckled, looking at his friend. 

“What do you mean?” Ashton played innocent and turned down the music.

“Who is she?”

“Who is who?” Ashton knew he was acting stupid and knew there was no way to escape this talk, but couldn’t stop. 

“The barely clothed girl in your living room. We both know she’s no daughter of a family friend. Your family don’t have friends like that. So who the fuck is she?”

Ashton sighed in irritation, stopping at a traffic light, and switched the radio off. 

“You remember I left the club the other day and never came back?” Calum nodded. “We met that night. She had nowhere to go to, so I persuaded her to stay.” 

“You persuaded her to stay in your house?” Calum asked him, not ready to believe what Ashton was telling him. The drummer just hummed in confirmation. “Bet it wasn’t that difficult to do,” Cal added under his breath, making Ashton frown in confusion. “So, now you’re living with your one night stand?’

“Fuck, no, Cal!” Ashton screeched, overtaking a car in front of them. “I didn’t sleep with her, you crazy? She’s just nineteen!”

Calum shrugged. “So? Nineteen is legal, for your information.” 

Ashton’s frown got deeper. “I didn’t sleep with her, okay? And have no intention to. She just needed help, so I’m helping her. There isn’t anything else to it, so just drop it!”

Calum kept looking at his friend with an unreadable expression on his face, close to concern but still not close enough. But to Ashton’s relief, he didn’t say a word for the rest of the way.

Luke was pacing in the studio nervously when they arrived, while Michael was slowly plunking on the strings of his guitar.

“The fuck are you late again?” Luke started scolding them the moment they entered.

“Sorry,” Calum replied with a smile. “Ash decided to open a foster home for kids in difficult life situations, so we had to go and take care of it.”

Ashton looked at Calum’s back with all the anger he had inside right now. “Shut up, Cal. Where’s everybody?” he asked, looking at Michael. 

“Went to grab some coffee,” he explained, not hiding his interest in what Cal had said before.

Ashton dropped his jacked and picked up one of the notepads they were working on the lyrics in.

“So?” Luke asked him.

“So what?” Ashton looked up at Luke.

“Foster home?”

“Oh good god, can you just drop it?” Ashton begged and rolled his eyes.

Luke looked back at Michael, who shrugged and answered, “No?’

“There’s no foster home. Just this one girl.”

“What girl?” Luke shook his head, not getting anything from this vague explanation. 

“Just...a girl,” Ashton growled.

“And who is she?”

“She’s... just a girl I’m helping. I met her couple days ago and decided to help. End of story. Now, can we, please, get to work? We’ve got an album to write.”

He sensed his bandmates sharing looks of amusement and concern, but refused to acknowledge them. He felt they were ready to drop the topic and that was the only thing Ashton wanted right now. This and, maybe, to know that what had happened before didn’t scare Y/N to the point of her leaving while he’s stuck here with these three idiots. He reached for his phone to text her and check if she was doing okay, when realised he hadn’t asked for her number. The only thing left for him now was waiting till the evening when he’ll be able to see her again. If she doesn’t decide to run away, of course. Ashton couldn’t explain where this fear of losing her came from, but he was afraid. And he didn’t like that at all.

***

When Ashton parked his car near his house, he breathed out with relief. Partly because this long day, full of guys sharing looks behind his back and keeping loud silence, has almost finished. But mostly because he saw the lights in the kitchen on. She was still there. 

He shook his head, entering the house. Why was it so important to him? Less than forty-eight hours ago they didn’t even know each other. Yet now his peace depended on whether she was here or not.

She was sitting at the kitchen island. A notepad, a pen and a cup in front of her. She was staring at a half-empty page, obviously deep into her thoughts. Only kitchen lights were on, reflecting from the chrome taps and sink and leaving grey shade on everything. She looked thinner and sadder than the night they met. And she didn’t register him coming.

“Hey,” Ashton called on her quietly.

Y/N flinched and looked back at him. “Hey,” she sent back. 

Ashton came up to the fridge and picked a water bottle. “How did it go with Mrs. Powell?” he asked to start a conversation some way. 

Y/N shrugged, looking back at her notepad. She bit her lip, tapped on the page couple times and looked at Ashton warily. “She didn’t buy it, you know,” she informed him.

“Didn’t buy what?”

“That I’m your family friend's daughter from Australia,” Y/N leaned back on the chair and started explaining. “She went to the room I’m staying at while I was having breakfast to change sheets. She saw trash bags with my stuff. People don’t travel from Australia with their clothes in trash bags. Plus, I don’t have any accent.”

Ashton just shook his head. He took couple of sips of water and said, “She’s a smart woman and won’t ask questions she doesn’t need answers to.”

“She’s been looking at me strangely since coming from upstairs.”

Ashton sighed. “She’ll get used to you. And you’ll get used to her.”

Y/N hand faltered at these words. She wanted to remind him that Mrs. Powell will not need to get used to her, as she wasn’t about to overstay her welcome longer than it was planned. But something in the way Ashton was looking at her tonight stopped her. She was afraid to cheat herself, but she was sure there was hope in his eyes. 

“What are you writing there?” Ashton asked, pointing at her notepad and dragging her out of her thoughts again. 

“Just making a plan.”

“A plan?” Ashton repeated with a smile. She was taking it all so seriously, he thought. 

She shrugged, leaving his silent question unanswered, and picked up a pen again. 

“You know, if you need any help with it or with anything else in the world, you just need to ask.” 

Ashton cursed himself for these words the moment they left his mouth. He could see how she straightened her spine and shook in discomfort. He reminded her of the position she was in. And even though his intention was completely opposite, he upsetted her. 

She dropped a simple “Thanks” and lowered her eyes. 

Ashton sighed again and took keys on a chain from his jacket’s pocket. He went out of the studio at lunch to make a copy of keys for her and was holding them out now. Y/N looked at his outstretched hand and then turned her eyes to his face. She was looking at him intently, like asking if she really needed them. Ashton was returning her look with confidence, offering her an opportunity not to depend on him if she needed to go for a coffee or to the corner shop. He saw the “I’m only here for couple more days” in her eyes. He shrugged it off, she smiled, her eyes thanking him for trusting her enough, and took the keys. 

“I also think it would be better if we exchanged phone numbers,” Ashton noted, slight hoarseness in his voice, “for while you’re here.”

Y/N took his phone he offered and input her number in it. She shrugged, handing the device back and said, “Not sure if you’ll need it though. I switched mine off, cause Josh was bombarding me with calls and messages.”

“You could change your number,” Ashton suggested, shoving his phone in his jeans’ pocket.

Y/N shook her head, “It’s nothing, he’ll stop in couple days.” 

She looked away again, like trying to hide something. Ashton asked himself why would she need her old phone number. Was she still so in love with that asshole that wanted to leave at least some chance of getting back together? And then it struck him. Her phone was the only chance for her father to reach her, not her shitbag of an ex. Provided, of course, that her father would want to reach her again. 

“If you don’t need anything, I’ll go crash, okay? The day was too long to bear,” Ashton mused out loud, not daring to share his insights. 

“Yeah, sure,” she forced out a shy smile. “I’ll finish here and will go too.” 

Ashton looked at her for one more moment, searching for anything alarming, but she seemed calmed and didn’t look like she was planning a runaway. So he nodded and strode to the stairs. He was at the far end of the living room, when her trembling voice reached him.

“Ashton? Can I ask you something?”

He stopped, turned back to her and leaned on the wall. “Sure.” He could see through the dimly lit room how she took a deep breath, gathering her courage for whatever question she had in mind. 

“Do you think Josh ever loved me?” she finally asked looking right at him. 

Ashton cursed everything in this world. Why couldn’t she ask who Cal was or if Ashton had a girlfriend? Why this? He crossed his arms and frowned. Sadness filled his insides. She was just a little lost girl, could he really kill her with the truth right now? How much more pain was waiting for her in her life? Didn't she deserve some mercy from him? 

“Ashton?” Y/N called on him and, meeting her eyes, seeing her strength behind her fear in them, Ashton realised he wouldn’t be able to lie to her.

“No, he didn’t,” he said. But seeing her nod, couldn’t stop from going on. “It wasn’t because of you, Y/N. I don’t think that your ex is even capable of love. Some people,” he stumbled, looking for better words, took a deep breath, “some people just need to have control over another creature. To feel their own significance. You’ve just been an easy prey for him, too young and too in love not to see it yourself.”

“Was I that stupid?” she whispered.

“No,” Ashton took a step forward. He wanted to reach out to her, to hold her, physically remind her she wasn’t alone, not anymore. But he couldn’t. She was alone with her pain and she had to go through it. “You were never stupid, Y/N, don’t even think like that. You were just young and naive in the best meaning of this word. And your ex used it.”

Y/N nodded, but didn’t say anything in return. Ashton kept looking at her, noticing how she didn’t start crying and wasn’t about to, as far as he could see from where he was standing. 

“You know,” he added couple moments later, “as I see it, we all have to go through some shit in life in order to learn our lessons before we get our happily ever after. Maybe if you try to look at your relationship with him this way, it’ll make it a little easier for you. Learn your lesson and move on.”

She nodded again, whispered “Thank you, Ashton,” and turned away.

Ashton stood there on his spot for what felt like an eternity, feeling his wish to save her growing stronger inside of him. He didn’t want to go into depths of his reasoning. He just wanted her to get out of this situation she was in now and be all right. So he silently prayed for her and went upstairs, disappearing in the shadows of his enormous house and taking all his messed up feelings with him. She didn’t need them. At least not tonight. 


End file.
